How To Deal With People That Have Experienced Trauma

Experiencing trauma can change a person so much that they become unaware of how their actions effect others. The unawareness is almost never malicious however it is often taken that way. A life changing experience that results in the loss of a loved one or several close people can also create more long term feelings of sensitivity. This can come out in many forms. It can come out in anger, depression, addictions, pushing good people away and more. 

What is the best way to help someone who has experienced trauma? 

Being nurturing towards that person regardless of how they are acting or have done in the past is a start. You can't be overbearing though, you have to show small signs of nurturing and build it up. Building up trust will help their walls slowly come down. Getting them into counseling and maybe meditation will introduce them into different ways of looking at situations. This could help them sort through some of what they experienced and come to peace with it all. During this process, do not put yourself in a position where you are enabling addictive behavior or in harms way. Go into it with a good head on your shoulders and good intentions. Expect to experience disappointment during this process and don't let it discourage you.

It is important to note that acting nurturing towards someone who doesn't want it or someone who doesn't deserve it is challenging.  

Someone who does not want to be nurtured is generally angry and irritable.

It is always best to respect their space and become someone who adds something positive to their life. It can be something as simple as "the joke of the day" or asking them to help you fix something that is easy for them to fix. When its over the other person could feel a little sense of accomplishment and purpose. Since each person is unique use the creative juices in your brain to figure out what little task you could do to add a little joy to their life.

Sometimes the people that need nurturing the most are the hardest people to give it to. 

Spreading love and peace is one of the most important things that we can do while here on earth, even to the people who say they do not want it. Most importantly, spreading love to people who don't deserve it is one of the best things that you can do for yourself.

Love thy enemy. They are your enemy because they did something bad to you. Probably something malicious. Love them because they do not have the experience and knowledge that was needed to deal with things differently. Knowledge is a gift. If you possess the knowledge that allows you to love someone that did something horrible to you then use that knowledge and love your enemy.